This is the final chapter and it covers the last three years of my life....on the personal front....Since my divorce I have been attempting to put my life back together and it has been a very slow process. While I believe I have made great strides in the self aware and healing department my living situation has been a slow go. I am still living at my mom's house but do hope to find more permanent living arrangments sometime next year. It has been very frustrating because I really don't like living at my mothers house but my options are limited because I am a casuality of the crazy real estate prices. Houses have tripled since my divorce and I can't afford housing. I feel best about my relationship with my two sons. We have drawn very close through these difficult times and I have the kind of relationship I never had with my own father. We spend alot of time together and we talk about everything. This is the part of my life that I feel most proud about.....on the religious/spiritual front....Despite my present self imposed exile from church I continue to read, discuss, and interact with Christians on a regular basis. I was a part of a church plant a couple of years ago but that fell apart. I have visited a number of churches over the years but I have yet to feel a strong connection. I don't blame the churches and admit my efforts have been minimum. My nuanced, pomo leaning, theology makes it difficult to fit in because the vast majority of churches in my neck of the woods are very conservative. I have posted this before but I live in one of the most political and religious conservative areas in the country. Bakersfield was ranked the most conservative city in California and fifth in the nation. There are a few mainline, left leaning, churches in my area but they are generally very small and the congregations tend to be older. Don't mean to imply I have problems with old people but, in my area, they generally don't keep up with what is happening regarding theology, philosophy, and the emerging church movement. I have do on occasion attend mass with my girlfriend but do find the various exclusionary practices of the Catholic church difficult to accept. Am interested in a much more inclusionary vision for the Christian church but these kind of churches do not exist where I live.... I have also tried to engage a number of people locally about what I see happening on the religious landscape but there just doesn't seem to be much interest. I even participated in a book discussion group on Brian Mclaren's book, A New Kind of Christian, but the interest in the book was lukewarm at best. I think we covered the whole book in only three meetings.... Living in Bakersfield is like living in a time warp. We generally are about 20 years behind everyone else and it is very frustrating which is why I spend most of my time interacting with others on cyberspace. I am currently a member on a number of different discussion groups but my group home is Pomoxian which can be found on yahoogroups. I have been an active member on this group for years and I enjoy the relationships that have been established and I find the daily interaction intellectually stimulating and helpful. I still continue to try to keep up with the lastest happenings on the various relgious fronts. Just finished a couple of Bart Ehrman books and am currently reading Elaine Pagels book on the Gospel of Thomas. I found the recent hoopla on the Da Vinci Code interesting because it opened a few doors to discuss the early church, documents, Christian tradition, which are all subjects I am very interested in........I honestly don't know where I will end up ten or twenty years from now but I am currenlty content with the journey I am on and I just try to take it one day at a time and hopefully grow in grace towards myself, my neighbor, and the world....and...hope and pray that the people I work, live, and interact with on a daily basis will feel loved by my actions and my words....May God help us all