Top Reasons why Star Wars is better than the Lord of the Rings
In Star Wars, the short guy kicks ass. In LotR, the short guy needs a box.
Unlike Gandalf, Obi-Wan does more than make rooms brighter
The force is the ultimate power, while the ring does little more than compliment a fancy outfit.
It takes half as much time to type SW than it takes to type LOTR.
Saruman sends out Orcs to do his bidding. Vader kills enemies personally.
LOTR has a couple o' lousy towers. We have the DEATH STAR!!!
At least Star Wars has an actual villain, not some stupid burning eye sitting on top of a tower.
Luke would want to try and find the good in Saruman.
When Luke left home, he got over it.
The relevent backstory can be told in a 30-second scroll, not a 900-page novel.
Instead of the movies deviating from the books, the books deviate from the movies.
Top Reasons why Lord of the Rings is better than Star Wars
LOTR: No love triangles involving a brother and sister.
Where else do you find a second breakfast?
39. You can get more beer in Middle-Earth
Uruk-hai, unlike stormtroopers, can fight.
In LOTR the comic relief (ie Gimli, Pipin & Merry) actually speak proper English
Liv Tyler, Miranda Otto, and Cate Blanchett. Let's hear it for options!
LOTR made three movies at once. George, are you taking notes on this?
Because even the dumbest creatures in LOTR would be smart enough to know that making Jar Jar a senator is a bad idea
The White Council in LORT included Galadriel, who was youthful and divinely beautiful despite being over 4000 years old. Yoda of the Jedi Council looked like hell after a mere 900.
LOTR is better than SW because the furry movie characters never launch into song
Merry and Pippin are slightly less annoying than C3PO and R2D2. Slightly.
It's more satisfying to see an Orc get beheaded then a Stormtrooper fall down.
Peter Jackson simply cannot make shit up as he goes along.
Interspecies relationships work in Middle Earth. I don't think Leia and Chewbacca ever had chance.
Top Reasons why Star Wars is better than the Matrix
Because Yoda REALLY DOES know Kung-Fu.
Jedi Knights don't need sunglasses to make them look cool.
Even a kid can understand the Star Wars plot.
Matrix has one The One, and Star Wars has The Chosen One and Obi-One
You don't need pills to understand Yoda's teachings.
Instead of " There is no Spoon " you get " Feel the Power of the Forks ! "
Neo can dodge bullets, but Luke doesn't have to cuz stormtroopers can't shoot!!
Star Wars didn't fall apart after two movies. It took four.
C-3PO has more facial expressions than Keanu.
It only took one trilogy for The Matrix to go bad.
I don't see any Matrix plush toys, do you?
Yoda's grammar slightly better then Keanu Reeves'
Star Wars has an ending.
No-one camps out to see the Matrix
You don't need a degree in Philosophy to understand the script.
The power of the One is insignificant compared to the power of the Force
Neo got killed trying to save Zion, Luke only lost a hand while saving the galaxy!!!For more humor check out the following link
http://www.theforce.net/
1 comment:
Hi Bilbo,
I'm enjoying all this movie related humor. I got a couple of Star Wars toys at Burger King today - a Jabba the Hutt that squirts water and some fuzzy little critter (not an Ewok, I don't know what it is, probly in the new movie...) There are 31 figures in all to collect. They're made in the "SD" style. Seen 'em yet? I know your toy tastes run to bigger scale and more realistic, but these are kind of cute in their own cheap and tacky way...
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